Rant thread

[abctax]

"Child Distraction" fee....

I now have a new item for invoicing, thanks!

[geekgirldany]

I've mentioned this before on the forum... but my poor cat has endured alot from the kiddies. He has a chair that he lays in next to my desk. Of course the client's kids want to play with him and pet him. My cat though it not friendly. I don't even think he likes me half the time. I have the scratch and bite marks to prove it.

Most of the time the parents will keep their children away from him while he goes and finds a hiding space under my desk. Well last year these people brought their kids in and they were wild. I mean I've seen these kids at stores like this but never had any in my office. They decided to chase my cat down. I mean they were down on their hand and knees crawling under my desks. My cat was hissing and puffing up.

Parents just stood there listening to me. Not saying a thing to the kids. I was trying to talk to them and make sure the kids did not get bitten. I finally told the kids "Get up out of the floor and leave the cat alone. I won't be responsible if he bites or scratches you. I've told you twice already and this makes the last time.".... with the last part looking at the mother. She took them up and made them sit while the return was finished.

Everytime a child comes in now I grab the cat if he hasn't already ran away and put in the back room. He doesn't deserve the same punishment I get j/k

[powerage]

Had a client today asking where her check was. I wanted to say "what part of we will call you when your check is ready part did you not understand"? Plus, it has not been 8-15 days yet.

[Black Bart]

Para-lawyer

...But, you gotta love the ones who call you with a legal question because their lawyer would charge them!

These are the ones that just kill you -- they'll do anything to avoid a lawyer fee 'cause they absolutely know you'll be cheaper.

Elderly guy came in last fall -- said "Are you a notary REpublican?"
BB: "Yes" (can a Democrat be a notary public?).
EG: "How about drawing up a will for me? That lawyer downtown wants $100 to do it."

I don't know whether to be flattered that he thinks I can do it or insulted because he thinks I'll do it for less (never mind that he doesn't know I can't practice law -- although I did hack around on one or two back in the old days before everybody got so dang picky).

[BP.]

I once told a client "You can't claim Rover as a dependent because he doesn't have a social security number." The next year they were back in and they had what looked for all the world like a genuine Social Security Card with the name "Rover Canine Smith". I wonder if Rover has had or will have his identity stolen.

SSN card- Weird, but kind of adorable!

[erchess]

Mistake I made

I once told a client "You can't claim Rover as a dependent because he doesn't have a social security number." The next year they were back in and they had what looked for all the world like a genuine Social Security Card with the name "Rover Canine Smith". I wonder if Rover has had or will have his identity stolen.

[Larmil]

I've had the distinct satisfaction of charging "Child Distraction" fees for several clients already this year. Makes me feel loads better as I vacuum the cracker crumbs from the carpet.

"Pet Peeve"- As someone who is owned by a couple of canine pals, I used to smile sympathetically when asked (facetiously, but frequently!) if pets can be claimed as dependents. Then I had to endure client's vet-bill-rant. I'm shutting that one down this year. With head down, straight face, serious tone, I'm asking- Yeah, do you have their SSN's?

I remember the year we first started having to furnish dependent SSN's. The number of dependents claimed dropped drastically.

[BP.]

I've had the distinct satisfaction of charging "Child Distraction" fees for several clients already this year. Makes me feel loads better as I vacuum the cracker crumbs from the carpet.

"Pet Peeve"- As someone who is owned by a couple of canine pals, I used to smile sympathetically when asked (facetiously, but frequently!) if pets can be claimed as dependents. Then I had to endure client's vet-bill-rant. I'm shutting that one down this year. With head down, straight face, serious tone, I'm asking- Yeah, do you have their SSN's?

[RitaB]

LOL, Harlan

I've no objection to this atall, and it happens often, too. Once, before Christmas I met my doctor at Office Depot (he said he was shopping for Christmas gifts for staff, IOW office supplies to make their jobs easier.) I didn't hesitate to describe a brief medical episode that happened to me a couple of weeks ago to which he said call his office and schedule three tests. I did, had the tests, and haven't heard anything negative from him about them.

Hmm.. no news is good news?

Bet those three tests only cost $1000...

[Lion]

Questions

I definitely like the questions from non-clients and handle them about like mentioned; i.e., quick answers with a smile vs. let's make an appointment to research the more complex, still with a smile. I get new clients from those questions and from questions at church and from my broker and from a lawyer from church and from the people that don't leave their preparer but still recommend me to others.

But, you gotta love the ones who call you with a legal question because their lawyer would charge them! Or a retirement question that should go to SSA or their financial advisor or the investment question that should go to their broker.

I had one last week: a corporate bookkeeping client of mine (I also prepare the 1120-S, but don't do their payroll and am not an employee of the corporation) has an employee who called me at home to argue for over 90 minutes to complain that he's paying more taxes than he should (TurboTax) due to the corporation's SIMPLE and match and the brokerage charges a $50 annual fee and it's not fair! I'm not the one he should've talked to. I tried to explain, since the corporation is a big client of mine. He complained to the corp president that I wasn't watching out for him. Duh! I'm hired as an IC by the corp to watch out for the corp. Besides, I thought I very graciously offered time and explanations and dug up some info to print out for him (TTB mostly) the next morning to fax to him. Just can't satisfy him. Luckily, the corp prez is satisfied.

[ChEAr$]

OK, TODAY, my major peeve is people cornering me at church, Wal-Mart, the Castrol place, at HOME, etc. to ask me a "quick" tax question. (What other kind is there? Hmm?)

I've no objection to this atall, and it happens often, too. Once, before Christmas I met my doctor at Office Depot (he said he was shopping for Christmas gifts for staff, IOW office supplies to make their jobs easier.) I didn't hesitate to describe a brief medical episode that happened to me a couple of weeks ago to which he said call his office and schedule three tests. I did, had the tests, and haven't heard anything negative from him about them.

Hmm.. no news is good news?

[rjholmes]

And what about the cell phone users

I have a nurse practitioner client who is constantly talking or texting on his cell phone while I am asking him questions. I have thought about visiting him in his office with my phone to my ear just so I could give him the same courtesy.

[RitaB]

Yeah, they don't get it

[QUOTE=gboykin;92944]I love when newly separated clients call and ask if they would come out better of they filed separately or jointly...Yesterday, after going through all this, the client says at the end, "So, you think I would be better off filing separately, right?"QUOTE]

I know, it's unbelievable. Like asking the doctor to make a decision about your rash/chest pains/stuff coming out of your nose without even seeing you.

And, how about the ones that get married on New Year's Eve, messing themselves out of HOH/EIC, etc? Hey, how about invite me to the wedding next time?

[gboykin]

And per the young children in the office, yesterday brought another situation. Client brought in her 2 young boys (ages 7 and 5), and they were just fine. Stayed in the lobby and played with their Nintendo DS's. However, the mother kept getting up to check on them. No one else was in the office, and we could hear everything from my office. Well, it was a pretty complicated return. They had employee business expenses, she is a teacher so qualifies for 250 teacher credit, itemized deductions, home energy credits, student loan interest, well, you get the picture. I got everything in and told her how she came out, her husband came in and was also a distraction, asking all kinds of impertinent questions (didn't pertain to the return at all). Got everything signed and as soon as they went out the door, I realized that in all the commotion of her checking on the kids 14 times and her husbands questions, I left off the student loan interest and educator deduction. Don't think I would have missed these without the distractions. Had to call them and tell them that I had to change the return and they would get back about 500 more. They live close to me, so I dropped the new copies by their house. Needless to say, they were thrilled, I was ready for the day to end.

[RitaB]

Will Rogers

Now the guy dropping by to ask questions because his preparer isn't in WOULD be a nuisance. Off the top of my head, I'd be inclined to say to him "I'm pretty busy but I can take time for you. Before we get started, should I send the bill for my time to you or to your preparer?" That might get the point across.

Thanks for the feeback on Mark Twain. Between him, Will Rogers, and CS Lewis there might be enough quotes for a lifetime.

I love this one by Will: "Never miss a good opportunity to shut up." Has saved me some grief in life.

I love CS Lewis, too.

Yeah, that guy that kept dropping in, I WAS pretty rude to him the last time. He was actually asking me questions about his basis in mutual funds. Can you believe it?!